Monday, March 5, 2012
The Rush to Bully
Last week was not a good week for bullies. First Andrew Breitbart unexpectedly passed away and then Rush Limbaugh began his hostile verbal bullying of a woman who had dared to express her opinion about birth control coverage. Rush is not as I see it the problem; he is a damaged person who makes tons of money selling hate while numbing himself with multiple marriages and painkillers. There are always people without integrity willing to sell their soul for fortune and fame. But how did he get so powerful in the first place, who's buying what he's selling?
It is shameful in my opinion to perpetuate hate for a living. It is just bad karma. Every time we see a preacher, politician, or pundit spewing hate at a group there is almost like clock work a scandal exposing them for doing the exact thing they were just condemning. The fact that it is now whole networks and even people running for the highest office in the land is sad. As is the notion that it is politically detrimental to stand up to a bully like Rush. When George Will described the GOP leadership this weekend, it kind of said it all: They want to bomb Iran, but they're afraid of Rush Limbaugh.
Unfortunately hate never runs out of supply, but I think the more the world is changing the less long term stability it has. The next few years will probably be great for hate. There are still large section of the US not happy that we're becoming a multi-cultural, religiously, and sexually tolerant nation. They'll probably double down on fear frightened that their way of thinking is under attack. But eventually, and this is surely happening in the generation below mine, they will bawk at such discrimination and hate.
It's a percentage game, eventually times change and the youngsters of today are sweeping in a different era one in which they all have friends, family members, or are social media fans of a cornucopia of people. They have gay friends, hispanic classmates, atheist uncles. They think it is cool to have a black president. They don't want to fight wars over religion because they know people from that religion and they realize they are just like them.
Bullying and hate is the easy, cheap solution. The more noble, sustainable, healthier solution is to come together and see what we can do bringing the best of ourselves to the table (or radio, tv, work). If we must fight let it be for how best to help each other, how tolerant we can be to our neighbors, and how much good we can bring into the world. Hate is so played out... let peace, prosperity, and partnership be what we teach our children, hope for our nation, and practice for ourselves.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Get Happy: Bright Side Up!
Today is Book Day for my friend Amy Spencer, her Bright Side Up: 100 Ways to Be Happier Right Now is being being released today- Yippeee! One of the blessings of my life in the last few years is getting to meet some awesome writers through my agent Laurie and many of them are now pals of mine. So when one of their books comes out I am usually very excited and supportive no matter what, but with Amy I am extra excited because... I am in it!

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Dating Optimism |
The book has been getting rave reviews and is on many hot lists: Oprah, Shape, Star, Psychology Today, O Magazine, and numerous blogs. The thought that people are going to be thanking it forward makes me verklempt with happiness.
Amy lives her life as an optimist and whether it comes naturally to us or takes some effort I think there is no better way to go thru life- so I encourage you to watch her video, buy her book, follow her @datingoptimist and if nothing else bring a little bright side up into your life today :)
It's also a perfect time of year to add a little optimism to your love life, so check out Amy's first book too!
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Scatter Joy .... & Jenna
Yesterday I called to wish a guy friend of mine, will call him "Fred" (he's shy), congratulations on a new job offer. I was so happy for him and was thinking what a great guy he is and how this company is going to be lucky to have him. I had just hung up the call when I see my pal Jenna McCarthy (not the Playboy naked one, although she is hot enough to be asked) posted this tweet. I was so inspired and it struck me that I always tell my closest friends how much I love them but I don't often get that mushy with my guy friends or my other friends.
Well off went an email to Fred telling him how his Mother would be so proud of him as a person, the gorgeous, fun, kind kids he is raising, and the amazing husband and friend he is today. I had a warm fuzzy right after that I shared with Jenna who then also got a warm fuzzy -which might be slightly alcohol-aided because at this point she was drinking a toast to her Dad- ... then not too much later got a note back from Fred that he was so touched that he passed the note to his wife (one of my BFFs) who responded: now that's the kind of email you save for when you need a pick-me-up!
So one tweet brightened 4 people's day, and I am sure many others because Jenna has many followers who probably did the same. And you're reading this now and will also partake too, right?
The world might be scary and times might be hard but it takes but a minute to find some Joy, or Jenna, and scatter some happiness and appreciation in your path today.
Scatter Away :) ... (: ... :) ... (: .....
*btw: check out Jenna's hilarious new book for some more good vibes, warm fuzzies, and a plethora of profanity and get a daily treat by following her @Jennawrites.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
ME Mapping: Creating Your Year
Want to have your best year yet? Want to hedge your bet just incase the Mayans are onto something? Want a map of where you're going and where you've been? Excellent! Then ME Mapping is for you:
You can also check out ME Mapping (for your current life).
(UPDATED for 2014 from original 2012 post.)
You can also check out ME Mapping (for your current life).
(UPDATED for 2014 from original 2012 post.)
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Friday, December 30, 2011
Don't SOMEDAY Your Life Away!
Was looking forward to mellow relaxing holidays to bring in the new year... that is not how things ended up going. No need to bore you with details, but the point is that we never know how our day, week, or year are going to end up. Things pop up- some that delight us, some that knock the wind out of us. And as always, they are just another reminder of how short and precious life is.
Every time something spoils that I was looking forward to enjoying, or I saved something for a special occasion then never end up using it- I remind myself to not save things for good, but instead to enjoy them in the present. The companion of this sentiment is: don't someday your life away.
We always say were going to get around to things we never do. We wait for calm waters to venture out. We wait for the perfect mate, job, financial situation, etc. to do the thing we think might make us happy. But why? What exactly are we waiting for?
Timing is many things, some might even say everything... but in there it must be noted that if we keep waiting for someday we won't ever get to it. Someday must be today, this minute, this NOW.
And what does it take to seize our someday? Less then a minute of insane courage in most cases (giving myself a full minute just incase). Yes, I went to see We Bought A Zoo and I loved this line, but it was more finding out someone important to me got some scary medical news and the debate about the Mayan calendar predicating the end of times that has me focusing on 2012 as a great time to stop somedaying my life away. Who knows, there is no guarantee for any of us there'll be a 2013 ;)
Really folks, what are we waiting for? What if there is no more time to someday away? What if it is now or never? If it isn't important enough for now let's let it go and stop wasting energy on it. And if it is important to us, let us seize the day, sieze the 60 seconds, and live into our lives with everything we have. Seize Someday Today!
Wishing you the Best in 2012 and no more endless Somedays only many many more brave Todays!
Friday, December 23, 2011
I Wish You Happy Feet!
This year has been a mixed bag of happiness with a few whammies thrown in. But this little guy and the lessons learned this year remind me that life is short and much richer when we spend our time, energy, and efforts getting happy.
Like Mumble, not all of our family, friends, co-workers, etc. are going to applaud our unique gifts. It is our job to not let ourselves be frosted over, and find somewhere... anywhere- even out alone on a glacier- to be able to express ourselves. And then create our own happy dance.
I beg of you: if you don't have something that makes you do a happy dance regularly, get your feet moving and find something. Life is too short, the winters are too cold, and the world is too wonderful not to find something to love!
Wishing you a fabulous Holiday Season and the Happiest of Feet in 2012!
Monday, December 12, 2011
Observe But Don't Absorb Other People's Messes
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Give Off Joy |
Why is this a bad thing? Well, because I had no detachment instincts- if people told me their problems or came to me with their messy lives I took it on as it was now my problem. How can I help this person? And I totally got off on helping and thinking how nice and wonderful it was of me- not to mention I loved the adoration I got from them after. But, it's a trap.
With maturity, heartache, and finally being drained by others, I wised up. What I finally got is that people's stuff is their stuff. They need to clean up their own mess. Do people need a helping hand? Sure. But we must be aware not everyone is salvageable or wants peace in their lives. There are people surrounding us who are pessimists that thrive on drama, they're taker, drainers, true narcissists... and they will never change- that's just who they are.
It is up to us who we let in our lives. I want to have people in my life who are inspiring, happy, healthy, loving, humorous, working on themselves, giving, etc. I want to absorb the lessons they have to teach me, the energy they emit, the love they give, the good company they provide.
For the others I use this bit of wisdom from my pal:
Observe, don't absorb.We can't get rid of all the toxic people in our life- they're everywhere: at work, in our family, in line with us at the movies. But we can decide we will observe what is going on with them without partaking in their negativity, drama, hostility, bad vibes. If need be just put on a magical suit of rubber and like we're taught in 1st grade let it bounce off of you and stick to them. It is no longer (really, never was) any of my business how people decide to live their lives, all I can do is try and be a good person, work on myself, clean up my own messes, and live at peace with my choices.
~Brandy Agerbeck
Now when someone comes to me with anything I see if they are open to a suggestion, appreciative of my time, willing to take on the bulk of the burden, and then I help when I can. But I get their issue is theirs to figure out and just because someone drops their mess of a life at your feet doesn't mean you need to pick any of it up. We decide what we absorb into our lives and so do others; I've chosen to absorb the good and observe the rest.
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