Friday, December 31, 2021
Sunday, October 3, 2021
Three months have passed and I can now look back with relief but I had a very bad time moving over the 4th of July weekend. I won't bore you with all the details but let's just say it was messy and stressful and cost twice as much and took three days longer than anticipated.
And when I woke up on July 5th I had a bit of a panic attack wondering how I ended up in a 100-year old farm house living next door to chickens and down the road from horses. 😳
Don't get me wrong, my new place is beautiful and homey and filled with light and charm and I have flower baskets hanging from my front porch and a flag waving in the wind. I now live in a little slice of Americana so idyllic it'll give you a toothache.
So when I was freaking out to my best pal Vickie about how uncharacteristically out of sorts I was she calmly explained to me I was like the plants sitting in my picture window nook. Plants don't like to be moved because they get use to the conditions they are grown in. And they especially don't like to be transplanted. Their roots are raw and they don't always take to their new pot, soil or conditions.
She said, your roots are just tender from all the upheaval and you need to get use to your new environment and you'll be good. I've moved more than a handful of times but I have never had a moving transition as unsettling before so I was upset that I was even upset. But then she used some of my own words back at me (which you know is extra-annoying 🙄) and said: so you're not enjoying big unexpected changes during a global pandemic... it clearly must be you!
Ha, ok yes, I guess when you say it like that.
This is just a little refresher to remind you (and later me, when I re-read) that we are in beyond weird times and since it's been over a year we seem to think any change is no big deal and should be almost normal by now. But trust me, I feel ya.
So if you too are feeling out of sorts and like your mind, body and soul are raw from whatever you're being uprooted from (relationship, job, home, whatever) it's ok. Just try your best to relax, unpack what you can at your own pace and focus on the good things: for me, it's my awesome tub-- but for you it might be more time to yourself after a breakup; getting away from a narcissistic boss after a job loss; or deep appreciation for your health after this scary time.
Because, heck, we're not even yet out of the pandemic, or a year away from a jarring insurrection, or back to a steady normal. So hang in there. Find joy where you can. And when you need any help along the way reach out to a good friend to remind you it'll all be ok when you get rooted in your new reality. If we're lucky - and if you're reading this, you are- we might even grow a little out of all this 💩
Be well 🤗💚🌻
Wednesday, March 31, 2021
I'm high! 🩹
I hadn't realized how much of a release it would be to get a vaccine. My emotions are all over the place and I'm writing this to warn you: you too might want to be prepared.
First, when my folks were vaccinated I could feel myself finally exhale: phew! I have so many friends who have lost both of their parents and so to have lost my Mom years ago but still have my Dad and my Bobbie around is such a gift. They've been in Florida this whole time and to have missed so many occasions and not know for sure when it would be safe to be all together was really tough.
Then there have been the other sadnesses that we've just beared. Friends have lost loved ones and I couldn't be with them to mourn in person. Killed me!
Missed a favorite nephew's wedding, lost a job, haven't had a professional haircut, yada, yada- you know! The amazing thing about my missings is that we've ALL had them. No one sailed through this without feeling slightly battered and bruised. At least we all collectively know how beyond bizarre things have been.
When I received the shot I got in my car to head back home but instead went for a long drive with the windows cracked belting out my new favorite tune 🚗 💨 🎶🎶🎶
This song from Begin Again has been reverberating in my head for days. And I sang it over and over at the top of lungs and am only now getting the irony.
And that's what we're all about to do again. See everything with new eyes. Get back the freedom to be with others and to be out in the world and begin our lives again.
Not going to lie I had a little upset tummy, which could have been from the shot or just the excitement of now being within sight of seeing my friends again in real life instead of a Zoom screen. To play games with my family. To hug EVERYONE!
Here's what I embraced most during the pause... life is delicate. I mean I keep re-learning this same lesson over and over. Life is short. Things can change in an instant. A couple swipes on your phone can connect you to new possibilities. A vote can restore sanity to a nation. A text checking in on an old friend can make someone feel loved. Delicate. Delicious life!
At some point we will probably need to put back on hard pants, go back into an office, and figure out the path forward. But if you are anything like me, you'll have a moment of gratitude at how lucky we were. How amazing science is. How there is no time to waste in life, even in just enjoying the pause when it's put upon us.
One of my besties has been too busy with a family crisis to do anything but check getting the vaccine off her long to-do-list so she was amused by my happy-high. Some will be: all shot, no chaser. But I reminded her that feeling the buzz of life being lived and taking a moment to breathe is what it's about. Feel it all.
So, I hope you and those you love are well. I hope you get a shot at/for health. I hope you were scared and sad just enough in this last year to treasure this return to "normal". And I hope when it's time for you to begin again you hug, sing and dance yourself around wherever you go.
🤗 🤍 😝 🤍 💃🏻 🤍
Special hug to 🤗 Chip
Friday, February 12, 2021
In this episode, he reveals that he had been horribly abused by the son of a babysitter from the ages 2-4. He doesn't go into much detail of the events but you get the idea of the brutality of it.He is joined in the episode by Debbie Millman who is a well known business/design/podcasting superstar. He asked her to lead the conversation because they are friends in the real world and she had helped him deal with this issue, as she too was abused as a child.
The interchange between these two is touching and sweet and so loving. But the truth that made me tear up while listening is not that they had both been abused (which of course is horrific) but that these two lovely, talented, beautiful beings both felt alone because of what had happened to them. TO THEM!
Debbie asks at the end of the episode if there is any final thoughts Tim would like the listeners to know and he says that he wants people to know:
You're not alone. It's never hopeless. There are tools.
You're never alone.
I've had several friends/loved ones who have been abused, had mental health challenges, substance abuse struggles, etc. It's hard unless you're a trained professional to know how to help someone in deep despair and some folks are just not able or willing to witness someone else's pain. But that's not a reflection on the one looking for comfort. There is always someone who cares. It's just a journey to find people who make you feel safe, heard and able to help begin the healing process. Debbie who has been navigating her journey for decades describes how hard it's been but how worth it is as well.
So if you ever feeling alone in the world, I wanted to leave this little sign here to let you know you're not.
Be gentle with yourself, get help from professionals when needed and know even in these crazy times there is hope and.. You're Not Alone. 🙏
Saturday, January 16, 2021
One of my favorite things ever is being right about something. I mean I LOVE being right! I have lots of opinions and let's just say when I take a stand I'm right much of the time.
Now part of the reason for this is because I like reading about an array of various topics and I've studied a good deal of self-help and had loads of therapy so I've honed my senses and understanding of human behavior. And because I also don't like to be wrong, I usually only spout off about things I feel like I know; otherwise I tend to be inquisitive of why someone is saying something or I look it up. That's the only way to play fair. If you like it when you're right (and don't deny it you like it too! 😉) you have to admit when other people are right and you are wrrrrong.
So as I've been pacing myself and spending a good deal of sparkle time in the beginning of the year, I was hoping I was right again that Trump would finish his grift for money ($500M+) objecting to the election results and then reluctantly concede, take a bow on getting the vaccine out and would start his next bid for attention on some cable station. But I was WRONG!
Last week's insurrection was a disgusting display of mob behavior but even more upsetting was that every American, including our legislators and his advisors, didn't immediately get Trump to leave office. Nixon's acts were dishonorable but to foment violence against his own VP and elected officials and our very elections as they were being certified is next level bullshit!
|(Photo By Tom Williams/CQ Roll Call via AP Images)|
Listen, I know it is heartbreaking to have a person you looked up to come out from behind the curtain and not be who he sold the public he was. Myself, I was wrong about Charlie Rose- who I admired and watched for decades. I talked about him all the time and would have vowed he was a decent man. Another one that hurt was that I was wrong regarding my adoration for Louis CK... sure this one was a bit more obvious- my bad! But nonetheless when it was clear I was wrong I said it. Not just to my friends but here where I touted my love in the first place. I tried to clean up my mess, mitigate my wrongness.
The only way to halt this nationwide divide and destruction and protect our country in the next few days, weeks and years is to speak the truth and undo whatever damage we've done.
If you quietly, privately voted Trump I guess just do better next time researching your choice (his lies and damage were clearly visible) but for the rest--- anyone who publicly spouted off about Trump needs to with same volume, vigor and verve speak out on how: he is lying about the election being stolen; that he was wrong to rile up a crowd then send them after Congress/VP; and that he was derelict in duty to not get National Guard in to help them immediately. Then state he is now unfit for office.
The ratio of regret needs to be equal to the denial and harm caused by those who stood by party over country; was OK with tax-cuts and judges while ignoring kids in cages and the lies and dishonor he brought to the office; and thought owning your annoying lib relatives and ex-friends was worth siding with racists, a pussy-grabber and the incompetents Trump surrounded himself with who would not speak truth to nor for him.
When The Daily Show can summarize the buildup of this looming destruction in a few minutes it's hard to say no-one saw this coming 😒
Our fellow-citizens, the world and for goodness sake our children are watching this. Own what we've contributed to this mess and let's get America back to where we are arguing about the proper corporate tax rate and school funding not about tearing down our democracy. We are better than this!
Friday, January 1, 2021
You can be sad or in a bad mood but you can't fling it at others. So sweetie, why don't you go take a minute and get a few fresh breaths outside or read in your room or pet the dog and take some time to sparkle yourself up and then come back as your wonderful self.