CREATING Workshop

CREATING 2014 Workshop from Joy Meredith

UPDATED: 
(CLICK HERE)

 CREATING 2013 

NEXT DATE:   November 23, 2013 
                            (*see special event details)

Time:                  10am - 12:30pm 
                            (*special time 11-12:30)

Where:                Illinois Institute of Technology
                              (Rice Campus)
                              201 East Loop Road, Wheaton IL  

Investment:     $100 now $120.13 at the door if available

Take Aways:    You’ll leave with a hard-cover professional artist sketchpad, an easy-to-follow guide to the technique, and a tangible blueprint of what you’ll be working on to create the life you want.

SPECIAL EVENT: For this month in celebration of my favorite holiday ThanksGiving I'm hosting this event for FREE. It starts at 11 and goes until 12:30.  Please invite friends and come celebrate a wonderful 2013 and begin to create a fantastic 2014!
Email me to let me know you can make it :)

UPCOMING WORKSHOPS:
(same location and details as above)

January 11, 2014

* feel free to come solo, you'll meet some lovely folks... but it's always great if you can do something this fun and important with someone you care about so invite away :)

It's Time To Be Selfish & Get Happy!

Today could be the day... or tomorrow... or July 22, 2022. Who knows? What I do know is that time moves fast and forward and is finite. So how shall we spend it? I say: HAPPY!

The Dalai Lama was once asked what the purpose of life is, his answer: to be happy. Everyone will find happiness in different forms but you only need look around to see, hear, and feel for yourself that we are surrounded by many, many folks who aren't living a happy day.

A few weeks back I was lunching with a close friend who from external observations looks to have it all: nice family, comfortable lifestyle, healthy, charitable, etc. And yet when we began talking about her plans for the new year she tossed around that she really needs to be doing more. Should she get a part-time job, do more volunteer work, what? I took a deep breath and mustered my compassion and offered up my boldly blunt take- stop with the doing, work on the being!

I have noticed that almost all my friends are living exhausted lives. Whether they're parents working inside or outside the home, or single and trying to date while moving up the success ladder- it's all this doing, doing, doing. And yet, all the things and people and activities seem to do is drain them; and while maybe not unhappy, they're not joyfully happy either.

As the unconventional friend who decided not to marry or have kids, and is wandering a different path it's so clear from my outsider's little perch our society is overwhelming our minds, our bodies, our kids. People are so worried about preservatives, guns, stranger-danger, and breast cancer when the top reason (75%+) people see a doctor is stress related. And it affects everything: OSHA reports workplace stress is a $300 billion drain on American industry. Even as someone who manages my stress rather well, that is not enough. Even Joy needs more joy in her life!

There is no one-size-fits-all solution to what will cure this malaise. But whatever it is, it starts with working on our happiness. My advice to my friend was more baths, naps, massages, fun reading, and time just drinking and hanging out with friends. Then coming from a rested, rejuvenated place she can create what would truly light her up.

Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive and then go do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.                                  ~Howard Thurman     

She paused, seemed taken aback, and then got choked up. She said it sounded so selfish to spend all that time and energy on herself. Really? Listen, there are things that need to be done to keep our lives moving forward but we do no one, NO ONE any good walking around exhausted, depleted and less then our fabulous selves. When I hear someone complain they have no time for fun or time for themselves because they have to run their kid here or there, or they have this obligation or that... I think to myself (and occasionally say outloud)- uhm, no you don't. Or at least you don't need to do it in a way that it completely leaves no time for you to work on yourself and your happiness.

In the last few years I have seen several friends go through painful divorces, and you know what even when it wasn't their fault, so to speak, it was... at least in some part. If you pour all your energy into your kids, house, pets, job, volunteer work and don't have time for yourself-- how happy do you think you are to be around? How happy is your couplehood? How happy is your home? How happy can your kids possibly be with exhausted, un-loved-up parents (wink, wink... you know what I mean)? 

You could wait until you have every-other weekend free to work on making yourself happy, or until you're sitting in a hospital bed waiting on your next treatment, or when someone you loves passes to get the hint or you could make 2013 your year of happiness. I guarantee you, there is no effort, dollar amount, time sacrifice that is too much to pay for your happiness. Everyone, EVERYONE, benefits from your happiness: spouse, kids, in-laws, co-workers, neighbors, lady in line behind you in the grocery store who catches a glimpse of your smile.

So my wish for you this New Year ahead is that you get selfish and get as HAPPY as you can be!

Want Peace? Let's Stop Shitting in the Pool

mountain view pool water abstract

On this 10th anniversary remembrance of 9/11 I am stuck for what to do... my friend Leslie lost her sister Katie in the twin towers. And although I never knew Katie, I now know her whole family and I know how much they dread all the drama around the date- they'd rather remember how she lived not how she died. Even when Bin Laden was killed I knew it would bring mixed feelings for them. Relief on one hand but no reason to celebrate at the same time. Leslie is a doctor and brings life in to the world as a ob-gyn, she would never celebrate the death of another human. 

So how to honor those who we've lost, and those who have been lost since fighting wars in the name of justice, and all the rest who serve as our everyday heros? Well I believe the way to do that is to take an inventory of what energy we are putting into the world. The world's surface is made up of 70% water and it is truly like one big pool that we all swim in together. Why should we care about someone half way around the world with AIDS; why should we worry about inner city kids getting a good education when we live in the suburbs and our kids are getting a great one; why should pollution in China matter in Chattanooga?

Because our shit- and by this I mean everything from our pollution, to financial corruption, to racism, to negativity, to violence- all eventually floats over to other parts of the world and pollutes the pool of humanity. Those kids we don't educate because they live on the other side of the tracks- wouldn't education by better investment then incarceration later? That "other" religion we think is so full of violence and hatred, can you say yours hasn't done the same throughout history?

We can all honor not only the ones we lost on 9/11 but the children that live on in their parents absence and all children in the generations to come by getting our shit together and handling it responsibly. Violence in our home- get help. Discrimination at our workplace- take a stand. Hypocrisy in our place of worship- stop supporting it. And whatever you and I need to clean up in our own lives- lets make that our contribution to peace in the world.

It is not Pollyanna-ish to say we can have peace in the world it just takes a lot of work. What if after 9/11 we would have gotten religious leaders all together to speak out on violence against any people, instead of which religion is better and more righteous then the other. What if we would have taken even a small chunk of the money we spend on defense spending (including billions on fighter planes we've never used) and invested in education and technology to come up with not only alternative fuel solutions but drugs and agricultural solutions for struggling parts of the world. If the huge changes in the Middle East during the recent Arab Spring proved nothing it is that technology and transparency overthrows dictatorial and corrupt governments faster, more efficiently, and cheaper then any military action ever could.

Shit floats and also infiltrates all aspects of our lives, we need to responsibly handle our messes as individuals, as countries, and as simply citizens of the world.

Peace to All.

[in memory of a truly loving soul Katie McCloskey]

The ME-ness of MEANNESS

All A Reflection of ME!

The Human Condition is so that we all are born with a propensity towards MEANESS in us. Can’t help it, everyone has meanness in them- everyone! As sure as everyone shits, everyone shits on others… including you. (do you hear how mean you are being right now judging the word choice I just used 😉).

Our shame, fears, righteousness comes from the fact we don’t want to acknowledge the me-ness in our meanness. We want to pretend we are all delightful and nice and if we are even the slightest bit mean it is occasionally, and for a good reason, and a milder form of meanness; not like her… she is horrible! I am only a little judgmental of her, which is not nearly as bad as what she did.

But what if we did the opposite and got into the dirt and dirtiness of our meanness and owed it? We are a certain height, weight, with a certain haircut in a particular moment of time why can’t the meanness we are also be a description of who we were at that time. Instead of hiding from our humanity like it’s not there, if we own it we can transform it.

The stories we tell about ourselves and our lives make up who we think we are, so who wants to make it a horror story? Instead we tend to gloss over what we brought to the situation and make someone else to be the bad guy (or natural disaster) vs seeing how we contribute to the narrative. 

People (and things) are what they are, what we say about them is a different story- or to be more precise: our life story. A 16 year old pregnant in the US is shameful, a pregnant 16 year old in another part of the world or at a different time in our history is perfectly acceptable. It’s the judgment we bring to the situation that dictates what’s right and wrong.  Killing a child= evil; taking out Osama Bin Laden= awesome! Taking of a human life is the same in both it’s just the story and circumstances that allow us to make different judgments.

So getting back to our meanness… I know when I fully own that I was being petty, righteous, judgmental in an apology to someone it makes all the difference. Just saying I am sorry or trying to justify anything is just more story and more avoidance of me knowing my nastiness & owning my meanness. And here is the really ironic and funny thing, the more in touch with the nasty side of us the better. Say for example, I am clear that I am only 10% to blame for a fight I had with my sister. I mean I can pile up all the evidence you want to see to show that she was 90% at fault. Can you hear I am being extra judgmental of her, and super-duper righteous? Which is going to clear the space for a real authentic relationship: my justifications or ... my ownership of my own part of the issue minus the condescending calculations of my portion of blame?

Your own nasty defensiveness might be asking: but what about what they did?
Their meanness is on their side of the equation and for them to figure out- their nastiness is none of my righteous business. If I am any part of the equation I am 100% responsible for my meanness and mine alone--and this goes for you too.

And although it is hard to comprehend the power on the other side- and it is extremely uncomfortable to do until you feel the pop of freedom- I promise you, owning your meanness is truly the way to live a joyful meaningful life. 

[inspired by: Vickie Austin & Kathy Bosco]