Don't SOMEDAY Your Life Away!

Was looking forward to mellow relaxing holidays to bring in the new year... that is not how things ended up going. No need to bore you with details, but the point is that we never know how our day, week, or year are going to end up. Things pop up- some that delight us, some that knock the wind out of us. And as always, they are just another reminder of how short and precious life is.

Every time something spoils that I was looking forward to enjoying, or I saved something for a special occasion then never end up using it- I remind myself to not save things for good, but instead to enjoy them in the present. The companion of this sentiment is: don't someday your life away.

We always say were going to get around to things we never do. We wait for calm waters to venture out. We wait for the perfect mate, job, financial situation, etc. to do the thing we think might make us happy. But why? What exactly are we waiting for?

Timing is many things, some might even say everything... but in there it must be noted that if we keep waiting for someday we won't ever get to it. Someday must be today, this minute, this NOW.

And what does it take to seize our someday? Less then a minute of insane courage in most cases (giving myself a full minute just incase). Yes, I went to see We Bought A Zoo and I loved this line, but it was more finding out someone important to me got some scary medical news and the debate about the Mayan calendar predicating the end of times that has me focusing on 2012 as a great time to stop somedaying my life away. Who knows, there is no guarantee for any of us there'll be a 2013 ;)

Really folks, what are we waiting for? What if there is no more time to someday away? What if it is now or never? If it isn't important enough for now let's let it go and stop wasting energy on it. And if it is important to us, let us seize the day, sieze the 60 seconds, and live into our lives with everything we have. Seize Someday Today!

Wishing you the Best in 2012 and no more endless Somedays only many many more brave Todays!

I Wish You Happy Feet!

This year has been a mixed bag of happiness with a few whammies thrown in. But this little guy and the lessons learned this year remind me that life is short and much richer when we spend our time, energy, and efforts getting happy.

Like Mumble, not all of our family, friends, co-workers, etc. are going to applaud our unique gifts. It is our job to not let ourselves be frosted over, and find somewhere... anywhere- even out alone on a glacier- to be able to express ourselves. And then create our own happy dance.

I beg of you: if you don't have something that makes you do a happy dance regularly, get your feet moving and find something. Life is too short, the winters are too cold, and the world is too wonderful not to find something to love!

Wishing you a fabulous Holiday Season and the Happiest of Feet in 2012!

Observe But Don't Absorb Other People's Messes

Give Off Joy

I'm spending a great deal of my time of late studying, reading about, playing around with the concept of happiness. And one of the big topics that often comes up is how to deal with toxic people and situations in our lives. Let me start by telling you how I use to deal with things.... most of my life I have been a rather optimistic person, so it pained me to see others in distress so much so I would try and help (read: fix) the situation. The dangerous thing is that I was pretty clever and wise even at a young age so I would often be able to help people out which led to more people, more fixing/helping.

Why is this a bad thing? Well, because I had no detachment instincts- if people told me their problems or came to me with their messy lives I took it on as it was now my problem. How can I help this person? And I totally got off on helping and thinking how nice and wonderful it was of me- not to mention I loved the adoration I got from them after. But, it's a trap.

With maturity, heartache, and finally being drained by others, I wised up. What I finally got is that people's stuff is their stuff. They need to clean up their own mess. Do people need a helping hand? Sure. But we must be aware not everyone is salvageable or wants peace in their lives. There are people surrounding us who are pessimists that thrive on drama, they're taker, drainers, true narcissists... and they will never change- that's just who they are.

It is up to us who we let in our lives. I want to have people in my life who are inspiring, happy, healthy, loving, humorous, working on themselves, giving, etc. I want to absorb the lessons they have to teach me, the energy they emit, the love they give, the good company they provide.

For the others I use this bit of wisdom from my pal:

     Observe, don't absorb.
                                ~Brandy Agerbeck

We can't get rid of all the toxic people in our life- they're everywhere: at work, in our family, in line with us at the movies. But we can decide we will observe what is going on with them without partaking in their negativity, drama, hostility, bad vibes. If need be just put on a magical suit of rubber and like we're taught in 1st grade let it bounce off of you and stick to them. It is no longer (really, never was) any of my business how people decide to live their lives, all I can do is try and be a good person, work on myself, clean up my own messes, and live at peace with my choices.

Now when someone comes to me with anything I see if they are open to a suggestion, appreciative of my time, willing to take on the bulk of the burden, and then I help when I can. But I get their issue is theirs to figure out and just because someone drops their mess of a life at your feet doesn't mean you need to pick any of it up. We decide what we absorb into our lives and so do others; I've chosen to absorb the good and observe the rest.

The Bigger The Fall, The Bigger The Bounce

Every year I write The Thanksgiving List and call my closest friends and tell them specifically why I am thankful for them that year. After Thanksgiving I do another sort of list- one about me; what I'm thankful for about myself. This year it includes realizing how far I've come since the sucky summer of 2002. It really struck me when I was having dinner with one of my best friends the week before Thanksgiving and we got into a deep conversation about how our lives are so different then what we expected 10 years ago. It was a great evening, one where you are listening and laughing and inspired by the fact we're old and wise enough to have a real adult conversation.

When we were saying our goodnights she was giving me a compliment that she wouldn't have made it through her ugly divorce if I hadn't been so supportive and great with her. I took the compliment in but then found myself realizing I wouldn't have been able to impart such wisdom (all modesty aside) if I hadn't already gone through rough times in my own life. Only because I've had such a big fall do I know it's possible to bounce back even bigger and better.

When you believe in the power of the bounce you do not fear failure the same. I am in no way encouraging the Universe to send me more shitty times, but I know I wouldn't be the same person without living thru the ones that have crossed my path. When you lose the person you loved most in your life, at least you know you are capable of big love. When you leave the job you once let define you, you know you are more then what your business card says you are. When you face financial challenges, you know what is really valuable to you. When you see your path and know you are headed in the right direction, you have compassion for those who haven't found theirs yet.

The only way to lose in life is to never make a move and stay stuck. Because if you play and fall, no worries, lean into the bounce and keep your eyes open for an even better place to land.

Are You Living A BIG Enough Life?

Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, valuable, but small. And sometimes I wonder... do I do it because I like it, or because I haven't been brave?

I love this quote from You've Got Mail. If you weren't listening closely you might have even missed this gem; it is not a huge scene in the movie but boy is it a golden nugget. Do we live small lives because we like them or because we haven't been brave? 

I know for myself I haven't been brave enough to live my biggest life. Deep down I know I need to be braver and bolder and more daring in almost every aspect of my life. The weather this time of year is a reminder of how nice it is to be cozy and tucked into our comfortable homes and lives. But is that the way we want to spend our life?

Ponder: Do we let ourselves be fully expressed? Do we say how we feel? Do we love with full abandon? Do we take the adventures we long for? Or the biggie: Do we live out our dreams?

My guess is that for most of us that would be a big fat NO. Well what are we waiting for? How dare we not live up to all our greatness?

I know when you have kids or a demanding job- or both- the time, money and energy factors are obvious convenient excuses. But really, what is a better example to our children, co-workers, family and friends then to be living a big bold life?!

Having lost people I loved when they were in their prime- or whenever I attend a wake/funeral- I often remind myself how lucky I am to be alive and there is no real obstacles in life just different paths to get us there. But I continually give up that inspiration for the comfort of complacency and smallness (yes, I get irony of my last post being about my height hugeness).

Well, I -and by this I mean you too- don't have time to waste. Life isn't guaranteed as it is, so we better get cracking. For starters I am going to commit to not saying no to anything just because I am afraid. I will take the fear on that lives only in my mind (this means no lion taming but any mental fear) and say fuck you fear!

Anyone with me? How big of a life do you want to take on? What can I do to support you? And this is not because I am nice, but because I might need your big brave shoulders down the line :)

Wishing you a big HUMONGOUS life, and one for me too!

June 26, 2012: Dedicated to Nora Ephron who lived a BIG (and valuable) life! ... RIP

Is Your Vibe More King Kong or Koala?

                                          King Kong                         Cuddly Koala

I am 5 11 1/2 and so not only am I taller than the vast majority of women but taller then most men too. The funny thing is when I am by myself I completely forget this fact. When you only have yourself to compare to you are the standard, you are the norm, you are what you say you are. So if you asked me how I picture myself, I would say I'm cute and cuddly like a koala bear. And even when I am with other people and realize my height I mostly still feel this is the vibe I give off.

Yet sometimes I forget how to others, and depending on situations, I can be more like King Kong. And if you don't know me not just my height but my personality, wit, and enthusiasm are often BIG. And I will admit if I am mad or feeling annoyed my anger and sarcasm can be just as big. Most of the time I love living in a world were I can be "looked up to" and heard... but in certain situations I know I intimidate some people. You'd think that our comments would be the same as if said by anyone else. Not so. Recently one of my good friends, who is a tiny power house, shared that even though she is a petite 5 2ish she can tell when her energy is giving off a bullying vibe. So it isn't just our height that gives off a dominating energy, there are several factors that mix including force of personality, our tone, how our body moves, etc.

When I was a kid I hated when my Mom bugged me about standing up straight. But as an adult I am so grateful she did because I think our posture and how we carry ourselves really makes a difference in how we feel and how others perceive us. Recently I was producing an interview conducted by author Tahl Raz with non-verbal behavior expert Joe Navarro and one of the things that really stuck out was him talking about how the energy we give off really speaks volumes more then anything we say. He used an example in customer service and the difference between when you can tell if someone greets you with real enthusiasm or is just blahly doing their job. Even without saying a word if someone faces you, gets up, walks briskly over, and then warmly greets you with a smile it makes a huge difference.

The eye contact, posture, tone of voice, pace we move... everything that our body signals to others is part of our communication. Just the other night on Oprah's Lifeclass she was talking about the same thing in a different context. She was recalling when Toni Morrison was sharing the important question: do your eyes light up when your child walks in the room? Our loves, our customers, our fellow human beings all react to the energy we bring to a space. People, especially children, notice if we notice them. What energy do you emit? Notice what you bring to the room first, and then what energy you leave people you encounter with. Are you engaged with them, bored, hyper, intimidating, flirty, hostile, relaxed, charming? If it's not what you thought it was, or intended- you have the power to change your energy.
Get going and give off some good vibes today :)

Faith In You

God made me an atheist, or I don't know, at least an agnostic. Don't worry, this isn't a post about religion. It is about how sad I get when I see people put their faith in something other than themselves.

There was a study done by Martin Seligman where he conducted experiments on dogs (this is sad but very insightful*) by shocking them and no matter what they did they could not avoid it. When these same dogs were then put into another environment they still cowered in fear because even though there was nothing that was going to shock them they had been conditioned into learned helplessness. As part of my next book I have been observing the energy flow in myself and others and one of the things that is so clear is when people give their power away. Relying on a spouse, a job, a guru, or God instead of realizing it is them that holds the power. How many people were born, married, or walked into a bad situation then let themselves remain powerless when they had long been able to take control?

Does that mean we can control everything that happens in our life? Of course not. But we do have control over what attitude we bring to a situation, what energy we give off, what we tell ourselves about what is happening, and how long a bad situation is going to affect us.

Last Friday I was lucky enough to attend a taping of Oprah's Lifeclass at her Harpo Studios. It was a great night and I was very inspired by the conversation. Oprah was talking (not preaching) about how at one time she was waiting on God to bless her life, but now she now knows God was waiting for her to take control of her own life. Her point was we are each responsible for our own lives, which I totally agree with; to think some outside entity is ultimately controlling our lives seems silly and destructive to me.

People like to put their faith in God because it is easier to rationalize that then the world is made up of energy that starts with pure luck then mixes in a good dose of karma and randomness- and is often not understandable, and sometimes cruel. I do believe in a universal karmic energy that flows thru my life- returning much of the energy we put out in the world. But to me the key is it all starts with us; and waiting on something outside of us is not having faith, it is having lack of it. If we're going to have faith, let it be first in ourselves and then in others... and if we need God in our lives let it be to thank him for building strength into us not randomly showing up when we're begging for it.

Oprah often quotes the movie The Wizard Of Oz when Glinda shows up and says: you've always had the power. Well YOU do have the power and you don't need to wait for an Oz or a big O of any kind to use it, just have faith in You, I do!


*love this summary from Brian Johnson of Philosopher's Notes

You Are What You Love

I remember nothing from the movie Adaptation but the clip above and the quote: you are what you love, not what loves you. 

The thought on the surface seems desperate, slightly psycho, but something about it rang so true. When I first saw the movie it was on DVD and I watched that part over a few times just to let it sink in. It was one of the most freeing thoughts I'd heard in a long while. Kind of like the "he's just not that into you" line from Sex And The City that seemed so simple yet so hard to absorb.

In our society, especially as women, we are taught to be afraid of our feelings and make sure they are appropriate, measured, and by all means don't make anyone feel uncomfortable. Yet as anyone who has ever had their heart broken because of unrequited love knows there are few things in our youth- hell, as an adult- as painful.

This revelation happened to occur around the time I was heartbroken over someone I knew intellectually was a narcissist who wasn't any good for me, but somehow could not seem to get over. And then it hit me: the heart is the strongest most stubbornly independent part of us and it doesn't listen to the head (or the gut or even our naughty bits) and it's a waste of energy to resist its power. Instead of shame or sadness we have the choice to simply give in when loves strikes or lingers in us and know that we don't need to justify it, fix it, or act on it. We can live with the fact love for love's sake can't really hurt us if we let it be and stop resisting it. It's when we resist what's so that we really suffer... and suffer. When I just gave in and realized he is my non-fatal achilles heel and I will always have a soft-spot for him no matter how illogical it is, then the suffering stopped.

More recently I developed a total crush on someone I don't even know personally, and instead of resisting and judging how delusional it is, I'm having fun with it. Life is short so we might as well enjoy it; besides, what's the worst thing that could happen? Someone knows I have a crush on them? Even when I haven't wanted to be with someone who has felt that way about me I am at least flattered... and impressed with how exquisite of taste they have ☺

My hope is we let love flow thru us, because we are what we love and I know the world can use all the love and good energy we can emit.

Despicable (Disappointed) Me!

I'm not afraid! Ok, maybe a little.

I was all proud of myself for making a big breakthrough in my book and my life a couple of weeks ago and was sharing it with my therapist who, as she annoyingly does, then pointed out something completely unrelated that apparently wasn't so clear to me. She made the statement that she thinks I'm afraid of people.

What?! I have no idea what you could mean... I am one of the most friendly, extroverted, outgoing, people-loving people I know. 

Yes, but what I mean is that you don't trust them, or the universe to not disappoint you- so you only anti-up so much and never go all in. You don't trust that you'll find your ideal job without having to sacrifice your ethics or feeling like you have to do it all yourself. Or just because you have lost in love, you don't think there's someone out there who could be a match for you-- in a world of how many billions?  

You don't have to believe in God to have faith in something; if you did you wouldn't feel the need to be so in control of everything. You're the worst kind of optimist, one who's subconsciously positive the world is going to disappoint you.*

Crap! I hate it when she's right. Ok, I'll admit it, the nasty little secret about me is that I don't trust people. I live disappointed in who people turn out to be. I love the vulnerability in people, but hate it when they're weak. I love the inspiration in people's stories, until I see the hypocrisy of them not living it every day. I'm more impressed with someone I have low expectations of that surprises me then someone who I think is great but find out is merely human.

As I'm driving home a slideshow of the disappointers in my life starts playing in my head and I am nauseous by the time I'm halfway home. As I talked about in the post The ME-ness of Meanness it is what we hide about our humanity that causes our suffering. So here is me admitting my nastiness. And even though I doubt I can completely cure myself of this issue, I don't want to be afraid of anything as essential to my life as people.

I have a friend, Justine, who always said: never expect anything from anyone and you won't be disappointed. She is such a sunny and warm person I was shocked at how negative and pessimistic that sounded. But now I see maybe having no expectations of life or others frees us up to put everything at stake just for the hell of it... because really what do we have to lose? Better to trust myself to handle the disappointment and anything that comes after the fact then not to have faith in people, love, and the universe.

*this may or maybe not be what she said, but this is what I heard

He Dented My Universe

Stanford's 2005 Commencement Address

When I read of the death of Steve Jobs on Twitter yesterday almost ever tweet for the following hour was about him. Sure it was news, but it was the depth and breath of the impact and sadness that struck me and sent a chill up my spine and many tears to my eyes. He was not a saint, he left the impression he was probably a challenge to work for-- but I have never been witness to a more inspiring brand or corporate leader.

Every day for the last 6 years I have touched something Apple related- including what I am typing this very post on now; and my Mac and I almost became one when I was writing my first book and the same as I am writing my second.

So the technology, the design, the feel are all brilliant... but, the thing that has left one of the biggest impressions on me is his quote: Make a dent in the Universe. I love this thought that our lives are meant to leave an impression, and although most of us won't achieve the same fame and monetary fortune, we can all dent the Universe we occupy with our own lives.

He talks of death as the greatest tool/lesson we have to teach us of the importance and frailty of life, I couldn't agree more. We can't wait another day to make our dent, find our love, change the world. Let's learn from Steve and take a big bite out the apple of life... and get to denting today 

Want Peace? Let's Stop Shitting in the Pool

mountain view pool water abstract

On this 10th anniversary remembrance of 9/11 I am stuck for what to do... my friend Leslie lost her sister Katie in the twin towers. And although I never knew Katie, I now know her whole family and I know how much they dread all the drama around the date- they'd rather remember how she lived not how she died. Even when Bin Laden was killed I knew it would bring mixed feelings for them. Relief on one hand but no reason to celebrate at the same time. Leslie is a doctor and brings life in to the world as a ob-gyn, she would never celebrate the death of another human. 

So how to honor those who we've lost, and those who have been lost since fighting wars in the name of justice, and all the rest who serve as our everyday heros? Well I believe the way to do that is to take an inventory of what energy we are putting into the world. The world's surface is made up of 70% water and it is truly like one big pool that we all swim in together. Why should we care about someone half way around the world with AIDS; why should we worry about inner city kids getting a good education when we live in the suburbs and our kids are getting a great one; why should pollution in China matter in Chattanooga?

Because our shit- and by this I mean everything from our pollution, to financial corruption, to racism, to negativity, to violence- all eventually floats over to other parts of the world and pollutes the pool of humanity. Those kids we don't educate because they live on the other side of the tracks- wouldn't education by better investment then incarceration later? That "other" religion we think is so full of violence and hatred, can you say yours hasn't done the same throughout history?

We can all honor not only the ones we lost on 9/11 but the children that live on in their parents absence and all children in the generations to come by getting our shit together and handling it responsibly. Violence in our home- get help. Discrimination at our workplace- take a stand. Hypocrisy in our place of worship- stop supporting it. And whatever you and I need to clean up in our own lives- lets make that our contribution to peace in the world.

It is not Pollyanna-ish to say we can have peace in the world it just takes a lot of work. What if after 9/11 we would have gotten religious leaders all together to speak out on violence against any people, instead of which religion is better and more righteous then the other. What if we would have taken even a small chunk of the money we spend on defense spending (including billions on fighter planes we've never used) and invested in education and technology to come up with not only alternative fuel solutions but drugs and agricultural solutions for struggling parts of the world. If the huge changes in the Middle East during the recent Arab Spring proved nothing it is that technology and transparency overthrows dictatorial and corrupt governments faster, more efficiently, and cheaper then any military action ever could.

Shit floats and also infiltrates all aspects of our lives, we need to responsibly handle our messes as individuals, as countries, and as simply citizens of the world.

Peace to All.

[in memory of a truly loving soul Katie McCloskey]

The ME-ness of MEANNESS

All A Reflection of ME!

The Human Condition is so that we all are born with a propensity towards MEANESS in us. Can’t help it, everyone has meanness in them- everyone! As sure as everyone shits, everyone shits on others… including you. (do you hear how mean you are being right now judging the word choice I just used 😉).

Our shame, fears, righteousness comes from the fact we don’t want to acknowledge the me-ness in our meanness. We want to pretend we are all delightful and nice and if we are even the slightest bit mean it is occasionally, and for a good reason, and a milder form of meanness; not like her… she is horrible! I am only a little judgmental of her, which is not nearly as bad as what she did.

But what if we did the opposite and got into the dirt and dirtiness of our meanness and owed it? We are a certain height, weight, with a certain haircut in a particular moment of time why can’t the meanness we are also be a description of who we were at that time. Instead of hiding from our humanity like it’s not there, if we own it we can transform it.

The stories we tell about ourselves and our lives make up who we think we are, so who wants to make it a horror story? Instead we tend to gloss over what we brought to the situation and make someone else to be the bad guy (or natural disaster) vs seeing how we contribute to the narrative. 

People (and things) are what they are, what we say about them is a different story- or to be more precise: our life story. A 16 year old pregnant in the US is shameful, a pregnant 16 year old in another part of the world or at a different time in our history is perfectly acceptable. It’s the judgment we bring to the situation that dictates what’s right and wrong.  Killing a child= evil; taking out Osama Bin Laden= awesome! Taking of a human life is the same in both it’s just the story and circumstances that allow us to make different judgments.

So getting back to our meanness… I know when I fully own that I was being petty, righteous, judgmental in an apology to someone it makes all the difference. Just saying I am sorry or trying to justify anything is just more story and more avoidance of me knowing my nastiness & owning my meanness. And here is the really ironic and funny thing, the more in touch with the nasty side of us the better. Say for example, I am clear that I am only 10% to blame for a fight I had with my sister. I mean I can pile up all the evidence you want to see to show that she was 90% at fault. Can you hear I am being extra judgmental of her, and super-duper righteous? Which is going to clear the space for a real authentic relationship: my justifications or ... my ownership of my own part of the issue minus the condescending calculations of my portion of blame?

Your own nasty defensiveness might be asking: but what about what they did?
Their meanness is on their side of the equation and for them to figure out- their nastiness is none of my righteous business. If I am any part of the equation I am 100% responsible for my meanness and mine alone--and this goes for you too.

And although it is hard to comprehend the power on the other side- and it is extremely uncomfortable to do until you feel the pop of freedom- I promise you, owning your meanness is truly the way to live a joyful meaningful life. 

[inspired by: Vickie Austin & Kathy Bosco]

The OPRAH Effect

There are less than 20 shows left until Oprah concludes her program and I wanted to share my biggest AHA Moment. This is the letter I sent in to her (with above pic):

Dear Oprah, 

The show that stays with and haunts me is Erin Kramp discussing her dying wishes for her daughter. 

But the biggest epiphany AHA Moment was on January 27, 2005. You were doing a show called Wildest Dreams and one of your guests wildest dreams was to meet you and another womans wildest dream was to get a house- you granted both wishes. The woman with the dream to meet you was slightly disappointed when she saw the other woman get a house. She said something like: I didn't know I could wish for something like a house- and your responses was something like: Well, it's your wildest dream so dream bigger next time. Now the spooky thing was just the day before I had been reading Jack Canfield's book The Success Principles and a cartoon on p30 had stuck out to me and it was this exact lesson:

Randy Glasbergen

WILDEST DREAMS! Even the same wording, so weird. This lesson hit me hard, and when only a month later I had a great idea I used both the cartoon-Oprah-Wildest Dreams-coincidence and Erin Kramp to get the nerve to write my first book. I had a book deal with HarperCollins for My Last Wishes... A Journal of Life, Love, Laughs & A Few Final Notes within 6 months.

The greatest lesson you have shared with us is that anything is possible. Dream BIG and Wild! Living into our wildest dreams isn't easy (which is why we needed all the rest of the shows, OWN, O magazine, Soul Series, etc) but this one lesson alone makes your 25 years on the air worth everything you and your staff have put into it. 

Thank you for the greatest gift I have ever received. 

Love,
Joy 

PS. Since I practice it because of you, My Wildest Dream is to attend the TED Conference and then share the brilliance with your viewers and readers (... and a house 😜).

So chances are Oprah will never read this story, but in thinking about how important this lesson is and my concern that others might not get the chance to have a similar epiphany, I came up with what I think is a fitting tribute to both....

Not that book clubs aren't also a great way to expand your life, but what is more important and a better use of time than to be working on our dreams (and helping along those of our friends)! My idea is to bag the book and dig your dreams out of the "someday" realm and get to manifesting them today. Sure nothing wrong with a vision board or some prayers but dreams have a better chance of coming true when they are spoken out loud and when we spend even 15 minutes a week working on one contribution to them. Maybe your dream is to be the next Oprah, that might be unlikely but start heading in that direction and maybe you'll host an event to motivate women in need. You'd like to be an actress on Broadway... would you be disappointed to star in your local theatre (closer than you probably are today)?!

What I learned is that we don't know where our dreams will take us, but if we don't dream or don't share them- the chances of them coming true are very slight. Plus what could be more of an amazing bonding experience then to help your friends get a tad closer to living their dreams. To quote my friend Stacey Edgar (read about her in post below): Start Small, Dream Big, Change Lives --and nothing wrong or selfish about beginning with yours!

I will tell you my life has been much more fulfilling since I started dreaming Big, Wild, Joyous Dreams!

Currently dreaming about:

• Attending Oprah's Finale. (didn't make it, on to next adventure)
• Having financial freedom with no debt and $1M in the bank.
• Attending the TED Conference.
• Living in condo with view of lake and city.
• 2013: Create Wildest Dream Project with Gretchen Rubin.
• Have ME Theory content serve 100K people.
• Starting a real life: Wildest Dreams Club- 1st dream-together April 20th 2013 YAY!!!!

What are your dreams? What are you doing to get the world to conspire to help them come true?

My Global Girlfriend

You know how you have a friend who is so amazing you can't believe you know her? This is one of mine:

 Eight years ago, Stacey Edgar had a $2,000 tax return and a deep desire to help provide economic security for women in need. She knew that of the 1.3 billion people living on less than $1 per day, seventy percent are women. What she didn’t have was a business plan. Or a passport. But that didn’t stop her from creating a socially conscious business that has helped poor women in five continents feed their families and send their children to school.


She was a "normal" person who saw that she could contribute something in the world to help others. So she started Global Girlfriend to find a way to support women in poverty. But it is not just her business that is remarkable, it is the story about how one lone person can make a huge difference to many.

If you never buy an item from GG or if you can't be bothered by reading a fabulous book... at least take her message:

 Global Girlfriends motto is start small, dream big, change lives; and my story is one of an average person taking a leap of faith to change her own life and the lives of women in poverty around the world.

Stacey might not be your friend, although if you knew her you would want her to be, but she is the kind of person you wish would be there to give you a voice and some hope if you were in need. My Global Girlfriend, Stacey, is doing it everyday... so take her message, buy her book, and let's all thank the universe for people like her.  

Flow, Grow, & Glow

hendriko

This year my theme is: Flow, Grow, & Glow. Each year I do a visioning exercise based on my Me Mapping technique and it sets the tone for the year ahead. Resolutions can be helpful, but a theme really creates a path and can guide you whether you choose resolutions to follow or not.

Flow because I learned if I resist change I suffer. Flow or chafe has been a motto for a while and it is so true; what we resist tears at us. Grow because it is the essence of learning and expanding who we are (with the one exception of waistline-- that I am growing healthier habits and reducing). 

And finally Glow which really speaks to my overall life mission and main motto:

I'm SOLAR! My life purpose is to absorb as much knowledge, wisdom, and inspiration as possible and hopefully light myself up enough to have others be touched by that energy. 

Long ago I realized that I have a big personality; so if I am not conscious of the energy I bring to a room, conversation, or project, I can affect the atmosphere pretty quickly. I figure if I flow with what life has in store for me, and grow and learn everyday, the GLOW I give off will not only warm my heart, but will touch those around me with a positive light.
What better way to spend a year?!

Cheers to YOU and your year ahead!